Your Advice, Please

It is a new year and I am debating on writing a letter to an old friend.  It is a friendship I am sad to have lost.  It was her choice but..

The story goes like this:

While in school, in the early 80’s, the girls had to take Modern-Dance while the boys took Football for P.E.  Our teacher made us take hands with another girl in order to become partners or she would assign someone. (I wonder if that could have started Lesbianism? lol) but I digress..  I asked a blonde, girl if she wanted to be partners and she said “Ok.” and so we danced.  (That sounded dumb.)

We became close friends.  I was a Bridesmaid in her wedding.  She made me wear a horrid, pink, dress.  (The dress wasn’t horrid, but the color was.  I HATE PINK!!).  She stayed with me for a while when she had problems with her husband, she was there for me during my many crisis with men.

Our lives went different directions.  We had a fight.  I don’t remember why.  Her last request was for me to be sure to tell her if I ever got married, or had children or whatever.  And I did:

The problem:  I was getting married.  We weren’t talking at the time but, I left her a msg and told her I was getting married.  I try to keep to my obligations with friends if I can.  But, there was no room for anyone else to attend.  She called back and said that she wanted to come to the wedding but there was absolutely no room and no way I could have invited her.

Needless to say, she was offended that I did not invite her.  We were not even speaking at the time.  I had only told her to meet my obligation.  It did not sound as if she really cared anyway.

I’ve apologised again and again, to no avail.

But, it is 2013.  It’s been almost 13 years.  I have started receiving Christmas Cards from her over the past 2-3 years, I wonder if she would be receptive to writing again.

Do you think I should try or continue to leave it alone and pray she will eventually forgive and come back on her own, if God wants us to be friends?

Please give me your opinion on this one, as I really don’t want to make the wrong decision.

*Later in the evening: –   Thank you for those who gave their opinions:  I have taken the step and written and mailed a letter to her today.  It is up to God now and of course to her to see if there will be another step.  It is time to start anew.  Hopefully.


  1. Friends are hard to get, especially close friends. Since it’s been so long you guys havent talk and now you’ve received christmas cards, I think both of you are given a chance from God to be friends again. Why not cherish that friendship again? =)
    I once had a very good friend, but she turned out to be a person who care more about getting more attention with popular guys in our college, It actually hurt my feelings, and now we aren’t hanging out and talking anymore, but I’ve always hope that we will be friends again. Hehe, just saying. =)

  2. Life is short and I would say “Do what your Heart tells you” Even if you write the letter and get nothing back, in my opinion, you have been the better person, yeah? If you write the letter, you may restart an old friendship. I say “What do you have to lose” At this point she ain’t in your life. You can only gain here. I say you do.

    Good Luck in what you choose.

    Shaun x

    • Thank-You, that’s sort of how I look at it too. We are bot different people now plus, she is in another state. Hopefully, I have at least gained a pen-pal again.

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