He Comes Home Today

My husband is coming home today and as expected, I got nothing done this wknd except laundry and working on my book a bit. It was a Smother’s Day Movie Marathon on Channel 150-Time Warner, so I did watch quite a few movies and I didn’t go anywhere due to not just energy/headache reasons; but also the fact that my transmission is slipping and I would really prefer my husband be local, should anything happen.

My husband forwarded a picture of his Mom and his Aunt so I could see them. It is sad how much weight his Aunt has gained. She used to be big before but… plus, her hair is so short, it is not attractive. I think she lost it big time when her mother died recently.

One thing I learned from the picture, (actually I knew this) if you are a large woman, I don’t recommend wearing splashes of color. At least in this case, it made her look like a Circus Tent.

Anyway, I guess it’s a cleaning frenzy today to see what I get accomplished before my Hero returns.

My 80’s Fashion Crisis

No, I am not having a mid-life crisis.  I’ve already done that. Seriously, I don’t even want to go there, however, I do think I may be having an 80’s crisis.  Is that a thing?  I think I want to go back.  I so loved and miss the styles.  Oh my gosh, I just bought an electric blue, lycra workout set from e-Bay.  It only has one minor spot on it.  It looks totally cool.  Yes, I’ll still work out to Wii and no, not Jane Fonda.  I used to have her workout album but I don’t think I do anymore.  Although, I can always turn on the 80’s station on my DVR and just dance.  That is exercise too.  “Let’s Get Physical..Isical..I want to get physical…” Yeah..Yeah, Didn’t I tell you I’ve lost it?

Oh yeah, Speaking of fashion, I found the perfect shirt for me.  I think I’ll order it.  Seriously.  It says, “Cats Not Kids.”  That is like so ME.  I know what my husband would say.  He would say, “If you want people to like you, you shouldn’t wear stuff like that.”  You know what? I’m tired of wanting people to like me.  They can like me or dislike me.  Whatever.  If I lived my world worrying about who does or does not like me; I’d probably be dead by now.  I am me.  Accept me for who I am.  Hmm.  I really want to buy the shirt.  I put it on my Amazon Wish List..but..why wait?  I have the money and it is so ME!  Heck, it is calling my name.  That’s it.  I’m coming shirt.  I am ordering you now.

Don’t worry, people with children who I know.  I will not wear it to your house or your functions.  Call before you come over and I will not wear it then either.  But  it’s me and noone can stop me from buying this now.  “Cats Not Kids.” Perfect!  Unless your a goat.  Then, I’ll take kids too.  Hey, I should wear that shirt when I go to get my hysterectomy.

 

Types of ‘Fashionista’s’

You know the runway models on t.v and in the magazines?  You know those outrageous outfits they wear that are supposedly in style?  Some of which you dream of owning, actually believing you could wear..somewhere?  Now, let’s think about your friends and family..how many people do you know that have actually worn any of those fashion model outfits?  I can give you my answer without hands.  ZERO!  Honestly, I have never seen any of my friends walking down the street wearing a feather boa scarf or  camel skin tights.  What?  You saw your friend Fred wear the balloon pants once?  That’s great, but did he spend $900.00 on them like the model?..I didn’t think so.  It just isn’t reality.  Plus,

Do any of those models have zits on their faces or extra weight in their rears, or big tummies or thunder thighs?  Who are those clothes really selling to?

Okay, so let’s talk about stores also.  When asking my friends where they buy their clothes, many will say, “I got it at Ross.”..Yeah, like the commercial or “There’s a great thrift shop, boutique, vintage store at…”  some will even say, “I went to the Goodwill or I found this online site.”  Most people don’t spend too much for clothes.

I was in the doctor’s office not to long ago on on a day when it was over 100 degree’s and in walked a sales girl wearing a black suit dressed to the hilt with jewelry and everything.  She didn’t look like she was sweating at all but she made me hotter than I already was looking at her in her black.  I made a complimentary comment on her outfit and she actually said, “Thanks, I’m a Maxinista.”  I smiled and we sort of laughed at that and I’m thinking  a Whatta Whatta?  just knowing I would have to go look it up on the internet when I got home…which I did.

Maxinista…someone who buys everything from TJ-Max and follows TJ-Max Fashion Trends.  Maxinista?  Really?  So, if you buy everything from Ross..would that make you a Rossinista?  For those of us that buy most everything online; why not call us Onlineista or Internetista? although that 2nd one sounds a bit to sexual.  Heck if you go to K-Mart, you could be a Kmartista.just put Ista on the end of everything and we could have a new trend.

Anyway, I was thinking as the girl flipped her hair and fixed her make-up in the waiting room across from me.  I have never been much into fashion,  My mother alway’s bought everything on sale so we didn’t stay up with the trends.  I was comfortable in my  long shorts and my cat t-shirt.  That’s who I am.  Most of my shirts have some sort of slogan and 80% have a cat motif of some sort.  I don’t dress to impress guys.  I dress to be comfortable.  From what I’ve gathered in reading blogs and talking to friends..most women nowadays agree with me.  However, if a guy were to walk into a room and see a girl wearing long shorts and cat t-shirt verses Miss Maxinista on a 100+ degree day, who would he choose to meet first?

My Weight Options

Well, I’m gaining weight again so I took myself shopping.  I totally needs shorts and a new swimsuit.  I want a Tankini.  Originally, I wanted one with a skirt attached but now I think I’m better with shorts.  I tried a skirt one on and I actually looked like a Tug-Boat.  Really Sad.  Even more sad.  After 5 or more hours of shopping (or I should say “walking around”) I came home with nothing.  Most things made me look pregnant and some things wouldn’t fit over my butt if I wanted them too (which I obviously did)).  I found one pair of shorts that were possible until I looked at the price tag.  I really don’t want to pay $21.00 for a pair of shorts.

Plus, the styles these day…have you seen them?  I am a 47-year-old woman!  I don’t wear ripped jeans.  I throw my jeans away when they get all ripped.  I prefer my shorts to be long.  Hey, my butt may hang out of those anyway but at least not as much; and if you think I am getting in a regular Bikini again, you’ve gotta be kidding me.  On some, they make the tops (and bottoms) with strings that can be untied.  You would think I could  trust people not to pull the string when in the pool but  some of my old friends get wild.  “Whoops, where did the top go?”  “Uh..No, I’m not playing that.”  We won’t even discuss the possible bottom string adventures.  Then, we have the jeans.  You think I am going to fit my flabby body into “Skinny Jeans.”  I don’t think so.

Heck, I had a Kidney Transplant and I am eating Gluten-Free.  Despite what you may think..Gluten-Free does not alway’s help you lose weight. I also have to keep my calories up and my protein at a certain level and since most Gluten-Free is very low-protein I wind up eating quite a bit of food to reach my goal.

Anyway, I have two main options.

I can either:

Start exercising again and try to stick with it.  This is the tougher one but probably the best one health-wise as, it would be good for my bones too.

or,

Gain more weight until I fit into a decent size  where they have more clothing options.  I am sort of in the middle of sizes now and it is very annoying.